|Ethan saying Cheese|
|Lily smiling because I played with her butt chin|
What is it with husbands not being as devoted or thoughtful as a mommy? I may not work 40 hours a week, but I do a lot more then most. I take care of our two children day in and day out with no complaints because that is what a mother does. I cook, clean, do the laundry, make bottles, and run my own business each day! I have a lot on my shoulders and yet I still keep it together. All I ask is for some help on a regular basis. I'm not asking you to split the red sea or give me the moon. Okay for instance: I was getting my tutu items ready for my first show case this Sunday! I have to get the bags ready, organize my tutus and much more tedious tasks. He comes into my sewing room to tell me he was going to clean up while I did work and when I came to bed it would ALL be done! Hearing those words was like music to my ears. If you knew my husband then you'd know how out of character that is for him! After 30-40 minutes of working diligently I cleaned up my mess and trotted off to the living room to see what all he had done, but to my amazement I found the room still a mess. Hurricane Katrina caused less of a mess, ugh. I am not sure what he was doing during that time frame, but I was annoyed beyond belief. I picked up all my son's toys, dinner plates and begin to wash dishes within 5 minutes. When he finally comes into the kitchen I have to know why on earth the house was still a war zone full of toys? His answer is priceless. I had to take a crap; the cleaning will get done when I have time. What a relief he put himself first again and didn't do what he said. This weekend his parents come to visit and I told him how hungry I was seeing how I hadn't eaten a good sized meal in almost 48 hours! James and his dad take Ethan to get lunch; once they arrive back at the house James makes himself a plate. He sits down in the living room and begins to watch T.V. while I am stuck wrangling our son up and get him fed. Then I had to clean up all of Ethan's mess before the potatoes crusted all over the place and after almost 45 minutes I was able to finally eat my lunch. I am not sure if it is just me complaining that my husband doesn't put anyone, but himself first because it seems as if he only does what he wants. At times I feel as if I am raising three children instead of two and quite frankly it's getting to be too much for me to handle. I work hard if not harder then him and I am trying to see it from his point of view. I don't know how to fix his short comings? You would think after 4 years of being asked to do this before doing what you want would sink in. He doesn't take any initiation and it worries me. If I weren't here doing all of the manual labor would he do it? Could our house stay this clean? Would the laundry be done in an orderly fashion? I cannot say for sure if he could handle all of my chores, business endeavors and most importantly the well-being of our children. What is mother to do? I have two wonderful children that GOD so graciously blessed me with and I will continue to bust my butt to give them a good life! Does he not remember how hard it was for me to be pregnant. I wasn't supposed to have children and yet he is going about his day as if he isn't thankful. I don't care how long it takes, but I will try to mold this guy I call my husband into a man. There is no I think I can, it's I know I can, I think?
**TO BE CONTINUED**